Successes and Failures

[Bruce Taylor C.Ht]

I am interested in the successful experiences and the failures that hypnotists have had during their life as a hypnotist. Whether it be clinical experiences or stage both would be great to hear about. If each would share a success story that sticks out in their mind and or a failure that sticks out in their mind and what you learned from each of those experiences I would be very interested.

Thank you in advance for sharing my many hypnotist brothers and sisters

Bruce Taylor CHT

[James Klingensmith]

I like this post it sounds like fun.

Success: Helped a woman find Jesus and go back to church with hypnosis. it was awesome and amazing in fact I have learned when you use a higher power than yourself, hypnosis works so much better in fact if you give the issue to God you can never pick it up again. Plus I learned hypnosis has helped me prove Christianity to people. most every religion believes there religion is real because of the way it makes them feel, we as hypnotist know that every feeling can be manipulated and anyone may feel at peace and with god in a hypnotic state therefore what separates the belief? I learned that Christians believe that Jesus rose from the dead and is the son of God they do not believe feeling one with the world or any good acts that make them feel good or bad nor in any feelings, So if any religion is correct and there has to be a God it has to be Christianity because that is the only religion that is not based on a feeling or hypnosis, instead facts, and documented proof.

Failure: the most valuable stage show I ever done was completely unsuccessful I learned so much from the show and I am glad my worst show ever is over!!!! No one was hypnotized I had a heckler yelling at me and the people on stage constantly.
I learned how not to do a show and that help me so much.

[GIL BOYNE]

Back in the sixties, when I worked nightclubs, I developed a technique to deal with hecklers in the audience. If the club had a spotlight, I would tell the light man, "If anyone starts to heckle me, put the spotlight on them." Then, I would speak to the audience and say " Ladies and gentleman, this gentleman is anxious to join the show", then I would start clapping and motion to the audience to join in while I kept saying, "Come on up, we know you are not shy--"Folks, just a little more encouragement and I know he will come up and I can continue the show. Almost always, they would stagger to the stage and I would really put them through some foolish and ridiculous stunts. Often they were so drunk, they thought they were the star of the show.
A few paid their tab and stormed out of the club and the manager would bawl me out. I always replied, my act is bringing in more business than usual and I expect the management to see that I am not harassed while I am performing"




James Klingensmith said:

I like this post it sounds like fun.

Success: Helped a woman find Jesus and go back to church with hypnosis. it was awesome and amazing in fact I have learned when you use a higher power than yourself, hypnosis works so much better in fact if you give the issue to God you can never pick it up again. Plus I learned hypnosis has helped me prove Christianity to people. most every religion believes there religion is real because of the way it makes them feel, we as hypnotist know that every feeling can be manipulated and anyone may feel at peace and with god in a hypnotic state therefore what separates the belief? I learned that Christians believe that Jesus rose from the dead and is the son of God they do not believe feeling one with the world or any good acts that make them feel good or bad nor in any feelings, So if any religion is correct and there has to be a God it has to be Christianity because that is the only religion that is not based on a feeling or hypnosis, instead facts, and documented proof.

Failure: the most valuable stage show I ever done was completely unsuccessful I learned so much from the show and I am glad my worst show ever is over!!!! No one was hypnotized I had a heckler yelling at me and the people on stage constantly.
I learned how not to do a show and that help me so much.

[Raymond Gardiner]

Hi Bruce,
I would like to share a rather challenging experience I recently had in hypnotising a seventeen year old football player.

I should start by explaining that here in the UK we have lots of football teams and the top players can, and do earn great sums of money. Each team has an apprenticeship scheme where they scout for and train as many as twenty or thirty young players with the intention of producing a player that will progress through their apprenticeship to become a professional player. As you can imagine there is a great deal of rejection throughout the entire system which can be devastation to the young person if not handled delicately.

I received a phone call from a rather distraught mother asking if I could help her son sort his mind out, she explained that he was a brilliant football player and for some unknown reason he was throwing away his life as a footballer because he couldn’t get his head sorted out. I asked to speak to him and was told he was out training and I should phone him after nine o’clock in the evening. I explained I could help her son but only after talking with him and that he would have to call me during office hours; so we made arrangements for him to call me.

Her son phoned me as arranged the next day, all be it a little later than planned and we had a good discussion about what was going on in his life. He explained that he had been playing apprenticeship football from the age of nine for a local team and was looked upon by people in the town as a great player (his words not mine). He went on to further explain that his team manager had recently moved to another town and had persuaded him to follow with the prospects of stardom.

Unfortunately after following him to this new team the manager had turned against this young player saying that his football skills were inferior compared with the others he was now playing against. The manager had given him three weeks to get his playing up to the level of the other players. I told him I could see him as my last client the following day and that my fee would be reduced to a level where he could afford to pay me but it was his responsibility to pay my fee; not his parents. Before finishing the conversation I asked to speak to his mother where I asked her to phone me during the day before my appointment with her son that I needed to talk with her whilst her son was not within earshot. I intuitively knew that my biggest problem was going to be with the mother.

Thankfully she called me as arranged and we had a good talk about the importance of being positive and supportive at this difficult time in her sons life.

The first Hypnotherapy sessions went extremely well and from his response and attitude I felt he would do well on the football field. However when he came for his third session his persona had changed, rather than presenting himself as a positive outgoing young person with every thing to live for; he came into the room with what can only be described as a desponded presentation of himself. It took some time questioning him about why he was feeling this way before he finally explained that his mother had shouted across the playing field during a practice game that he was playing like a prat and it was about time he started playing properly.

Needles to say you can imagine how my conversation on the telephone to his mother went when she eventually returned my calls. I thought I had explained the importance of being positive when we first spoke; but I know she understood me at the end of this call.

Then I could not believe what her son was saying on our next appointment when he told me that she had done the very same thing at the weekend when he was playing a proper game. He had been called onto the pitch as a substitute after another player sustained an injury. Ten minuets or so into his playing she started again shouting unforgivable comments at him across the field.

I tried everything I knew to rectify the damage, in fact I tried every trick in the book but failed. His mother in one heated moment had managed to undo everything we had achieved with our hypnotherapy sessions. To make things worst his mother said to me that she wished she had paid twenty or thirty pounds to get a proper hypnotherapist instead of only paying the five pounds I was charging her son. I felt like telling her that my fee was being charged at a level her son could afford and not my usual fifty pounds per session, I managed to hold myself though because as you know the customer is always right.

I feel particularly disappointed in my lack of success for not having the foresight to see how devastating his mother’s comments could be.

If I’m presented with a similar case in the future my first thoughts will be on group therapy for the family from the outset.

[Michael Haifleigh]

James,

Would you say more about the details, I would like to hear the story about using hypnosis to help a woman find Jesus and go back to church.

Michael


James Klingensmith said:

Success: Helped a woman find Jesus and go back to church with hypnosis. it was awesome and amazing in fact I have learned when you use a higher power than yourself, hypnosis works so much better in fact if you give the issue to God you can never pick it up again. Plus I learned hypnosis has helped me prove Christianity to people. most every religion believes there religion is real because of the way it makes them feel, we as hypnotist know that every feeling can be manipulated and anyone may feel at peace and with god in a hypnotic state therefore what separates the belief? I learned that Christians believe that Jesus rose from the dead and is the son of God they do not believe feeling one with the world or any good acts that make them feel good or bad nor in any feelings, So if any religion is correct and there has to be a God it has to be Christianity because that is the only religion that is not based on a feeling or hypnosis, instead facts, and documented proof.

[the grumpy hypnotist]

Hello Brother Taylor,

I've had many failures from my perspective and a common theme which runs thru many of them is that I've often tried to do things too efficiently, and not encouraged some clients to continue with more sessions, even if they could have gotten even "better", telling myself some story that I'm trying to save the client money, or that the client wouldn't want to come back... when really it is often driven by some personal desire to be a "fast" hypnotist, not to be seen as "pushy", or some fear that the client will not value the work (which is just a projection of my own insecurity about my value).

In other words, sacrificing long-term effectiveness in order to be "efficient". Taking a rare opportunity to create a pivotal, life-changing series of experiences for someone, and turning it into a personal quest to see how few sessions I can run them thru, pretending I want to save them a few bucks and a few trips to the office, when really it is driven by my fear and ego. I look back on these kinds of failures and feel ill, but I am sure I will continue to make those errors in the future.

On the other hand, a success just left my office... at the beginning of our meeting as I was collecting feedback about how she's been doing since the last session, she started crying. But I could tell it wasn't "bad" crying... she went on to explain that this past weekend, she actually felt like she liked herself as a person, and she hadn't felt that way in a long time. It constantly amazes and saddens me that humans can have such thoughts and feelings about themselves, that that would be something new to them. :-(

[Fable Goodman]

His Grumpiness,

I like and can empathise with all of that post!

Thanks!

Love and hugs,

Fable

[GIL BOYNE]

Hello Grumpy, I am glad to read your "confession" especially since I was sarcastically criticized (on this forum) for doing three sessions for smokers instead of one "quick trick".
In the "flowering" of my career, I sold eight sessions for most issues and problems and four to six for lesser ones.
"Quickies" are rarely satisfying!

[the grumpy hypnotist]

Hi, I find the failure of selling the client short is often driven by pressure because if I provided an estimate of # of sessions beforehand, then going beyond that might seem like I am a bad hypnotist, or that the client is not doing well, or that "it's just not working". So trying to live up to the estimate or artificial deadline, which often is a necessary part of marketing the service, can lead to shoddier, incomplete work, I think.

Not to turn this into a discussion about one quick trick sessions, but I often wonder if a related failure is that we may sometimes fool ourselves into thinking that because the client leaves with a big smile and says they feel great, and they are never heard from again, that is counted as a success. I have learned to largely ignore the client's immediate feedback about either great confidence about the success of the session, or client doubtfulness and uncertainty, at the end of the session, because it often doesn't relate to actual "successful" experiences in the real world. Of course, folks who are obsessed about doing things in one quickie session with no follow-up, can conveniently ignore that.

Many times the clients who are most "gung-ho" at the end of a session are the ones who run into most problems, while the uncertain ones (the people who are puzzled by the experience and feel OK in the context of the office but express uncertainty about if it will "last") are the ones who are stunned and happily amazed by the positive changes they are experiencing in daily life.

[Dan Elliott]

Here's a brief one, which I'd class as an amusing success.

It illustrates the simplicity of basic hypnosis beautifully. A new client arrived, we'll call him "Bert". Bert was having a plethora of life-issues at the time. He was highly stressed, and distressed. As he sat in my therapy chair, I simply progressed through my preamble on hypnosis, what it is, what it is not and so forth. He became very still, very quiet, then, in a very strong Irish accent (you'll need to use your imagination here) he said, "Dan, I'm going, it's happening .......".

Fascinated, I said quietly, "What's happening Bert, where are you going ..........". Bert's monotone reply went something like this: "I'm going Dan, its the hypnosis .... it's working .... it's working ....".

Somewhat bemused but very pleased, I progressed by saying, "very well Bert .... as you're already drifting down ... simply close your eyes .... and now ... go deeper ...."

So began Bert's first session, and possibly the easiest induction I've ever done! That day, many years ago now, taught me many things that you are not taught formally, nor will you read it in books. One of those points is that expectation on behalf of your client alone is sometimes sufficient to create a trance. Create that expectation, and you're halfway there!

Regards to you all,
Dan Elliott.

[Bruce Taylor C.Ht]

Grumpy,
Interesting, I also cut myself or my client short on occassion if you will because I do not want to come off as pushy. I tell myself that if I am pushy that the client may not really want to be there so they will be a difficult subject. The person that comes to me will be more successful as they are accepting as they asked me. I think in my head at times that this is maybe a cop out and I have to get myself back in check or my client base starts to diminish.

P.S. I meant to say also, good posts. Interesting as the subjects latley have been kinda stail. Not that I am saying it has for everyone, just the subject matter has not been interesting for myself.


Bruce Taylor

the grumpy hypnotist said:

Hello Brother Taylor,

I've had many failures from my perspective and a common theme which runs thru many of them is that I've often tried to do things too efficiently, and not encouraged some clients to continue with more sessions, even if they could have gotten even "better", telling myself some story that I'm trying to save the client money, or that the client wouldn't want to come back... when really it is often driven by some personal desire to be a "fast" hypnotist, not to be seen as "pushy", or some fear that the client will not value the work (which is just a projection of my own insecurity about my value).

In other words, sacrificing long-term effectiveness in order to be "efficient". Taking a rare opportunity to create a pivotal, life-changing series of experiences for someone, and turning it into a personal quest to see how few sessions I can run them thru, pretending I want to save them a few bucks and a few trips to the office, when really it is driven by my fear and ego. I look back on these kinds of failures and feel ill, but I am sure I will continue to make those errors in the future.

On the other hand, a success just left my office... at the beginning of our meeting as I was collecting feedback about how she's been doing since the last session, she started crying. But I could tell it wasn't "bad" crying... she went on to explain that this past weekend, she actually felt like she liked herself as a person, and she hadn't felt that way in a long time. It constantly amazes and saddens me that humans can have such thoughts and feelings about themselves, that that would be something new to them. :-(

[the grumpy hypnotist]

Yes, I can relate to that. I have also had experiences where at the end of a series of sessions, a client is looking to me, as the expert, for guidance as to whether or not they should come back for more, and for some reason I discourage them from coming back, even if I know they could do even "better", and they are not concerned about saving a few bucks. Man I am stupid! When I, as the professional subject matter expert, discourage them from coming back and doing even better, then they have to take that to mean that is as good as its going to get, which is never true. If I were my own boss I would fire me sometimes.

Bruce Taylor C.Ht said:

Grumpy,
Interesting, I also cut myself or my client short on occassion if you will because I do not want to come off as pushy. I tell myself that if I am pushy that the client may not really want to be there so they will be a difficult subject. The person that comes to me will be more successful as they are accepting as they asked me. I think in my head at times that this is maybe a cop out and I have to get myself back in check or my client base starts to diminish.

P.S. I meant to say also, good posts. Interesting as the subjects latley have been kinda stail. Not that I am saying it has for everyone, just the subject matter has not been interesting for myself.


Bruce Taylor

[GIL BOYNE]

I always offered a free interview (30 mnutes) and when the client called to ask about an appt, my stock reply was,
"I will give you a few brief tests and tell you whether I think hypnotherapy is indicated for your problem/issue.
If you test positive, I will tell you how many sessions I feel it will take and what the amount will be (avoid saying charge or cost). When they arrive, I ask a few questions,"Have you ever been hypnotised? Has anyone you know ever been hypnotised? Have you ever seen a hypnotism stage show? I get information about belief and attitude from their answers. I do NOT waste time explaining, "what is hypnosis and all that jazz"I use their mental expectancy unless they express negative expectation. Then, I give three suggestability tests and say, "you did very well--less than a third of those who come to me can do as well on their first interview as you did today
"Howvever, there is work to be done. I expect we can see some good results in as few as eight sessions"
I immediately begin to close by asking for payment in full for the eight sessions while saying, "if you are happy with your result in less than eight sessions, there will be a refund for the unused sessions.". If I could not get the full amount, I would settle for two payments (or three or more) but if you don't ask, you don't get" At the the close of the next to last session, I would say, "Here is your homework, You are to write out the problem you came with and then describe the progress you have made and finally, and how you feel about the results you have achieved and bring it to me on your next session. If you feel you need a few extra sessions I will book them for you then.

I know some of you may have objections to this kind of "process" but that is your problem. I had many years of direct sales,(encylopediae, vacuum cleaners, and more) and this procress clears the air for the client and advance payment prevents no-shows. So, screw up your courage and try something new.
PS. "The servant is worthy of his hire"



the grumpy hypnotist said:

Yes, I can relate to that. I have also had experiences where at the end of a series of sessions, a client is looking to me, as the expert, for guidance as to whether or not they should come back for more, and for some reason I discourage them from coming back, even if I know they could do even "better", and they are not concerned about saving a few bucks. Man I am stupid! When I, as the professional subject matter expert, discourage them from coming back and doing even better, then they have to take that to mean that is as good as its going to get, which is never true. If I were my own boss I would fire me sometimes.

Bruce Taylor C.Ht said:

Grumpy,
Interesting, I also cut myself or my client short on occassion if you will because I do not want to come off as pushy. I tell myself that if I am pushy that the client may not really want to be there so they will be a difficult subject. The person that comes to me will be more successful as they are accepting as they asked me. I think in my head at times that this is maybe a cop out and I have to get myself back in check or my client base starts to diminish.

P.S. I meant to say also, good posts. Interesting as the subjects latley have been kinda stail. Not that I am saying it has for everyone, just the subject matter has not been interesting for myself.


Bruce Taylor